BE CONFIDENt In LIFE & BUSINESS
My confidence coaching will help you be the leader you need & want to be
I know you're not one to rest on your laurels, or even give yourself praise, but you’ve worked damn hard to get as far as you have, so congratulations and well done. Really.
But sometimes your confidence still disappears, right? Sometimes you feel like you don't know what you're doing, like you're making shit up as you go, and that you really ought to be more confident in what you're doing.
This is where confidence coaching comes in...
Whether you're in an organisation, with all those eyeballs on you and people waiting for your direction and decisions and a mountain of expectations on you to deliver, or whether you're looking to become a leader in your own life and have your own sky-high expectations, shit gets real quickly, right?
In creeps that little voice that whispers in your ear, I'm not doing enough. Or, it’s just a matter of time before I fuck this up. Or, what if I'm not good enough?
You tell yourself that you won’t be able to do it, that you’ll screw up and look dumb in front of everybody ir that you’re out of your depth.
With those thoughts in your head and that ripe plum of fear and anxiety in the pit of your stomach, it’s easy to find yourself doing self-defeating things like trying to please others, pursuing perfection and wanting to prove yourself at every step. Not to mention beating yourself up for not being good enough and not having your shit together.
This is the part of being a leader that nobody told you about or prepared you for. And it sucks.
So, to hell with that. It's a perfect time to reach in and leverage your natural confidence to help you:
Natural confidence is your way out of all of that. I define it like this:
Natural confidence is accepting your full and unconditional worth, the ability to demonstrate self-compassion in the face of challenge, and the ability to lean gracefully and wholeheartedly into uncertainty.
With natural confidence, you get to feel like you’re good enough, right now—no conditions.
And that, wouldn’t you just know it, is exactly what I’m here to help you with.
I'll help you think confidently
Your experience is a result of the thinking that happens right there in that magnificent brain of yours.
With better thinking comes a better experience.
Problem is, much of the stuff that goes on in your brain flies way under the radar—an auto-pilot that constantly steers you towards safety and certainty and away from risk and possibility.
Your brain is a bubbling stew of stuff that wants to keep you safe, away from judgement and blame and rejection, and away from feeling not good enough, and it's this thinking that I work on directly.
My confidence coaching works in two ways:
We connect you deeply with the fundamental pieces of who you are, the elements that bring out your best and the foundations for what drives you. These things are hardwired into you. They’re not going anywhere. You can always trust them.
By connecting with this foundation, you build a relationship with a deep part of you that you can rely on, trust and rely on when you need it. And that, my friend, feels a lot like confidence.
We look at the thinking that short-circuits your natural confidence, those patterns of thought that aren't serving you well. People-pleasing, perfectionism, seeking validation and more besides, the very act of noticing these ways of thinking creates space for thinking that serves you better.
Peeling back the layers of thought that hold you back and get in your way allows your natural confidence to come to the fore. It's pretty damn liberating.
I have tools, tactics and techniques that help these two strategies come to life, and like Jonathan and Jennifer Hart, apple pie and ice cream or sunshine and margaritas, some wonderful things happen when bottom-up and top-down work together.
Importantly, my confidence coaching method has been developed and refined since 2002 but it’s not a cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all approach.
There’s no way I’d confine you (or me) to a linear, restrictive process. We’ll dip in and out of the content as needed, take some spontaneous detours and only use the right things when the time is right for you.
A bullshit-free zone
I want you to make an informed choice about the coach you choose to work with, so I want to be completely transparent about how I work and what it’s like to work with me.
I’ll be your partner-in-crime (note: we probably won’t be committing any actual crimes) and your biggest supporter. I’ll throw you what might be the toughest questions you’ve ever been asked and I’ll poke and prod through your thoughts so we can see what’s helping and hindering you. I’ll get bloody excited when we discover something amazing and I’ll call you on your bullshit.
I’ll always believe in you. I’ll be right there with you. And you can never disappoint me.
With that said, if you want a confidence coach who’s deadly serious and follows “conventional wisdom” that ain’t me. Sorry, but conventional wisdom is all too often generic, homogenised, ineffective mush.
I’ve built my confidence coaching method by looking at what’s actually worked through my 15+ years of coaching, not by following theory or reading a book about how you can be more confident by puffing out your chest.
I have zero interest in wanting to appear really smart or professional, because that stuff gets in the way of me coaching you and giving you my all. Life is equal parts serious and silly, so while I take the serious stuff seriously I laugh right along with the rest of it.
So if you’re looking for a generic, conventional, lip-serving confidence coach then you might want to look elsewhere, and let me wish you all the very best.
Are you ready for confidence coaching?
Continuing in the spirit of transparency, if you:
Then you might not be ready for this.
That’s totally fine—timing can be a real factor in this stuff and I want you to get everything you can from working with me.
I work with a handful of people at a time (between 5 and 10) to ensure I’m giving you every ounce of insight, attention and support I can muster, so if you:
Then we might just make a great team.
What people say about my confidence coaching
I find it to be a fantastic opportunity to gather valuable, unedited, first-hand feedback on where I’m at (and quite often where I feel I’m not at) from this very real, engaging, insightful and quite funny chap who genuinely cares and is steadfastly invested in helping us all suss out the answers we’re searching for.
If you’re serious about making your life better then it’s time to give Steve a call.
James Lloyd from Nottingham
I wanted to say thank you. I know what you do is a service and your work but it really is one that changes lives and brings back the pieces that fear clings to. You are an amazing man Steve and you do outstanding work. One of the reasons I feel you do this so well and with integrity, is because you have empathy and experience and it nourishes you to help others. Without which, it would just be hot air.
Tonya from LA
This has been one of the most rewarding things I have ever done for myself. I’m glad I took the time to find a coach that I felt comfortable with because there have been times when I have needed to touch on very private things and I feel completely at ease with that. I’m more confident, have a new excitement about life and a clearer picture of myself.
Never once did you tell me the answer. You guided me to find it myself and that has been the magic!
Stephanie Favell from Norfolk
After looking for a new job in 2015, and then all through 2016 with little luck, I was struggling with a lot of negative self-talk and doubt. I just landed a new job last week. Just wanted to say thanks – for being so damn authentic, and generous with sharing your hard won learning.
Nick Borthwick from New Zealand
To be honest I wasn’t sure how Steve could help me. but, after each session I am amazed at how he did. He has an uncanny way of responding and riffing on a conversation that is just enough listening and advice combined. Really sharp guy.
Paul Lewandowski from Maine
My life and confidence have improved significantly as a result of working with Steve. At work, I am able to remain calm and confident, to know my strength and forgive my weaknesses with compassion. I think honestly his unwavering and genuine faith in me is the fundamental piece that made everything else effective.
Loreline Amilhat from Florida
How it begins...
It all starts with a hassle-free, no-pressure, no-sales-patter conversation, so that:
You can book your free, 30 minute confidence coaching intro with me right now. My only aim in these is to offer you some tangible insights, and I'll never give you a hard-sell—I’m not peddling insurance or used cars here. You’re free to think about it and come back to me with a decision at any time, and if we find that we aren’t a good fit, that’s cool. No biggie.
From the moment you decide on me as your confidence coach I’ll be in your corner, supporting you and cheering you on. It’s you and me, partners in crime.
We’ll meet regularly via Zoom, and continue to talk, ask questions and keep up-to-date on progress via email between those calls.
How long we work together is really up to you, how deep you want to go and what’s of value to you. I’ll never assume to keep working with someone without establishing that there’s value being created.
Here are the most popular options.
Best for flexibility
We work month to month, moving fast & employing my best confidence-building strategies. Pause or cancel at any time.
Best for results
We partner for 3 months, giving you long-lasting confidence to help you lead confidently in life and business.
The most popular program.
Best for lifelong results
With a 6 month partnership I’ll be with you every step on your journey to be the kind of leader you always wanted to be.
A's to common Q's
I get a lot of questions about me and my confidence coaching. Here are some answers to a handful of the most common ones.
There's no set agenda, but it's an ideal opportunity for us to chat about what you'd like to work on and how you think confidence might help you. It's an open conversation where you can get a real sense of me and how I work, and we can figure out it we're a good fit. Also, with your permission, I can ask a few questions to see if we can generate any insights or clarity during the call.
This is different for everyone, and I get that this might not be a helpful answer! Look at it this way - my singular aim in every session is to add value and drive meaningful insights, and as long as you feel there's value we can keep going.
Some people come to me for a single session where we laser in on one area and see what we can discover within that session. Others I work with twice a month for three to four months, and other have a couple of sessions with me two or three time per year.
We'll do what makes sense, in the pursuit of growing your confidence and creating meaningful change.
I get that my fees might be out of reach of some. I do sometimes have space for clients who might not be able to stretch to my full rates, and ask that you tell me honestly what you can afford. I don't judge, and while I can't guarantee having an open spot for a reduced rate, I'm open to hearing you.
We talk. I listen to you, deeply. I ask you questions. Some easy questions, some not so easy. We'll go where it's useful to go, we'll follow the energy, with the intention of discovering what's there to be learned.
Sometimes it'll feel like you don't know the answers, or can't see clearly. That's okay, and it's part of the process. My job in a coaching session is to facilitate insight, learning and growth. The steps we take and the conversations we have are all in service of that.
I'll also set you homework to do after each session. It's between sessions where you get to try things out, do some more digging and see what's working / not working. Then, in the next session, we can see what happened with the homework and use that to help us see where we go next.
Unsurprisingly, this is almost impossible to answer. Some clients get results after a single session. For others it takes deeper, longer work to see things happen in a meaningful way.
What I can guarantee you is that my priority is in adding as much value to you, i.e. connecting you with your confidence and getting you to a place where you feel good enough no matter what, in the most efficient and effective way.
It's on both of us to be open and honest about what's happening, and what work remains to be done.
No problem. Being a leader often means that you lead in your own life first, regardless of your job title. Leaders don't dodge responsibility, they don't ignore what that little voice is telling them, and they align themselves around the things that matter to them, and they nurture and apply their self-confidence.
So if you feel like you need to take a leadership role in your own life, you're in the right place.
Any other questions, just let me know
It can be tough choosing a coach. Sometimes it’s weird and scary too, because it’s not something you do every day, and it can feel pretty exposing.
I get that, so if you have any questions about the process, about what results you can expect or anything else (except for sports, I know nothing about sports) drop me a line and I’ll get right back to you.