Making a decision is tough, but how do you know if you're making the right decision?
It's easy when something amazing is about to happen, and you yell "Yes please" because it's a no-brainer.
But other times making the right decision is trickier than having sex on four sharp rocks and more painful than getting a pedicure from a rabid doberman.
That's the thing with decisions; you don't know until afterwards whether it was a good one or a bad one.
Here's just a tiny handful of mine.
- I never went to drama school, and still wonder "What if..."
- I chose to spend way beyond my means in the 1990's and created huge debt
- I decided to ignore my bisexuality until I was well into my 30's
- I decided to buy my own home
- I chose to spend several summers in Portland, Oregon
The ramifications of these choices, and more, are part of my life now. And that's the thing.
The only way to know whether a decision is the right one, is to be on the other side of it
From the far side of a decision, you can take a look and make a call as to whether you'd make the same choice again.
But unless you've fitted a flux capacitor to your Prius you can't know this ahead of time. And if you can't know whether the choice you're about to make is right or wrong, the "right" or "wrong" judgement becomes redundant.
All you've got to go on is what's right here, right now.
And as you always make choices in the present, and as there's no way of knowing what's going to happen before it happens, there's only one way for you to know whether a decision might be the right one.
Because it matters
A decision that's based on what matters to you, what rings true, what resonates, and what has meaning, will always be a good choice.
Making the right decision will always be easier, simpler and less confusing if it's based on what really matters to you.
That's how you know.
Forget about right and wrong.
Look at what matters and what doesn't.
More on confident decision-making
MAKE BETTER DECISIONS BY AVOIDING THESE BIG MISTAKES
Making decisions is hard enough, without falling into these common traps and mistakes. Start making better decisions right here.
HOW TO MAKE CONFIDENT DECISIONS WHEN YOU’RE NOT CONFIDENT
It's easy to second-guess and doubt your decisions. So if you want to know how to be confident in your decisions when you're not feeling confident, read on.
We need to make some really cruddy decisions by denying our instincts/gut/Higher Self first. It’s the best teacher we have of realizing the importance of going within instead of just letting “logic” rule.
I agree Patricia. There is often a battle between heart, head and gut, and it’s easy to lean towards listening to one of the first two rather than the third.
My Dad always said to me “Don’t let your heart rule your head” as I was growing up. Fortunately he pretty much always let his heart rule his head, but every one of us grapples with this. Truth is, all 3 of those things have a role to play but going against your gut/intution normally doesn’t end up that well…
Hurrah!
I discovered 4 years ago that what feels right in my gut is always the right decision – even if it’s a scary or icky or difficult one to make, or even if I can’t quite see the outcome of it yet. That little voice seems to never be wrong, and I have learned to trust it ALMOST completely (we all have slip-ups from time to time…)
In 2008 I walked out of a high-paying, 15-year career, sold my home, and took a solo backpacking trip around the world…thank you, gut!
I’ve finally started ending relationships that I knew in my gut weren’t right for me rather than hanging on just to have someone in my life. Oh gut, you make me feel lonely sometimes, but you’re not wrong.
Those decisions have definitely cost me, but the benefits have outweighed the costs (most of the time. There are still moments. I think they are called “being human”.)
Interestingly, I have more difficulty with smaller decisions than I do with bigger ones. I agonized over whether or not to buy a hot pink blazer last week (I bought it, and now wonder daily if I should return it to the store), while I purchased a piece of land in Bali 3 years ago with barely an eye twitch (because my gut knew it was the right decision. Crazy, maybe, but right.)
I’m still practicing, like many of us, but I think I’m really getting the hang of it.
That little voice speaks loud and clear – you just have to practice hearing it : )